Ever wondered what types of plants to fill your garden with, below are a few suggestions.
Give your enemy some
knobweed, watch their smile turn upside down as they read the greeting card 'Thanks for stealing my girlfriend, KNOBWEED!!'.
Black mans willy ((Rhodochiton Volubilis)
Apparently the don't like the cold and they shrivel up.
If you have a black mans willy , or have seen a black mans willy , can you confirm this since i have yet to see one.
The Shag bark (Cary Ovata)
'Does it make you horny baby?'.
Nipple wart.(Lapsa communis). If you have nipple wart..
.seek medical help.
Stiff Cock (Diospyros Crassenevis)
I read that if you can give your wife stiff cock for her birthday she will be happy.
''His stiff cock is drooping. Should i give it more sunlight or talk dirty?''.
For the single guy a good gift is the cock hold herb (bidennis connata)
Though too much cock hold can make you turn blind.
This is sticky willy, once you have a grip it is quite hard to let go. Have you ever seen a sticky willy?
wow those are some great suggestions... Tomorrow I have to dig out a herb bed that has been overtaken by mint but I might now replant it with some of these.
ReplyDeleteLol thanks G, imagine the neighbours faces when you say 'i cant plant my stick willy', they will accuse you of an over share lol.
DeleteCool, gardening is pretty fun
ReplyDeleteThanks Baur.
DeleteLol @ Austin Powers.
ReplyDeleteGreat gardening tips! :P
Thanks Real Queen, I do like thatmoviel I used to hate it at frist because i thought it was having a go at British people. But then i realised it was affectionate so i loved it.
Deletehahahaha, Jon. i love the NIpple Warts !
ReplyDeleteLolol, thanks Jaya, imagine the person who came up with these terms i bet they were a great laugh to be around.Would you ever be able to actually ask for any of these in a plant store?, 'I want nipple warts' shop : 'try hanging out with homeless people, you'll be sure to catch it'. Not to bash homeless people.
DeleteIt reminds me of that joke ' My friend has green fingers ' ' you mean hes good at gardening/' 'no, he he never washes his hands'.
or you could walk up to the bar, and ask any bartender you fancy 'could i have a blow job, please ?."
Deleteor a slippery nipple.
or sex on the beach !
hahahahha.
someone i know have tequila shots with the salt licked off the cute bartender's neck :) well, it was her birthday!!!
Hahah, and what would happen if i asked the bar tender for a 'blowjob'? I would get beaten up, id be shouting 'not the face' and another bar tender who overhears would say ' is that with or without vodka'? Or i might get what i asked, and as hes climbing over the bar counter toward me with love in his eyes i will think 'Thanks a lot Jaya, at least i didn't ask for sex on the beach'.
DeleteAnyway what if a turtle sees something that looks like a tasty seafood snack ?, i will never have kids, but at least my new high pitched voice might get me in a choir.
LOL, had no idea plants could be so obscene.
ReplyDeleteThanks Mat lolol, yeah, there was a famous broadcast in England a show called ' Grdeners question time ' on the radio, its really famous. And they started talkeing about black mans willy plant. And the women were saying they heard they were good but they never seen on. And all the adudience was laughing about. Its on youtube if anyones bothered lol.
DeleteI only knew a purple version of the first and the second.
ReplyDeleteNice tips!
Thanks And, yeah black mans willy can be different shades i think, lol.
DeleteThere is so many jokes..
Lol those are some neat plants
ReplyDeleteThanks BAUR, iknow imagine your garden would be x rated.
DeleteWho knew gardening could be so... uncultivated. I made a pun!
ReplyDeleteThanks Baur, and a great pun it was too. I wont'grass' you up to the joke police, you 'seeded' my imagination....ill stop it. I think someone will hit me if i make any more bad jokes.
Delete